And I Thought I Had it Bad

So I lost my Internet for a total of three days. Ask anyone that knows me and they'll tell you, I was an absolute wreck. I lost weight, my blood pressure rose at a rapid pace, and I was squirtin' the butt mud out mah keaster. It's that same old song and dance, that stereotype which posits that we Generation Y-ens can't get by without our technology. It's actually quite disturbing when you think about it. Fyodor Dostoevsky managed to write 800-plus page novels in the Nineteenth Century all in longhand. I have a Mac computer and can pump out sixty words per minute, and all I can contribute to society is this damn blog. Let's try to put my dilemma into perspective. 

While I was skimming through the web pages of the New York Times I happened upon a "Global Update," the headline of which read, "Tuberculosis: TB Vaccine Too Dangerous for Babies with AIDS Virus, Study Says." Yeah, babies who are born, not only with original sin, but also with AIDS cannot be protected from Tuberculosis.

Goddamn! 

Meanwhile Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Steve McNair, Billy Mays, and Karl Malden have all recently succumbed to the will of an all too hostile God, and Public Enemies, a movie I've been waiting for over a year to see, sucked dick! (No offense to any homosexuals who may happen to read my blog. I love Oscar Wilde, even if he was a pederast). 

All I can conclude is that the world is cruel, and that my lack of Internet is not something to get too worked up over. My goal for the next two weeks is to live in a log cabin in the woods in Massachusetts and do nothing except read and reread The Iliad. Then I will write a book about it and die....of Tuberculosis.

Anyone? Henry David Thoreau? Anyone?